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ich fand dieses schmankerl auf mathworld
geggi, 9.4.2008 13:42 MEZ

What's the value of a contour integral around Western Europe? A: Zero, because all the Poles are in Eastern Europe.

16 Kommentare (< 3359 T)


986, 11.4.2008 21:09 MEZ

Die Nummer die sie wählen ist imaginär, drehen sie ihr telephon um 90° und versuchen sie es erneut.


Pseudomathematiker, 11.4.2008 18:33 MEZ

Aber der Pole-Witz hat doch noch eine nicht minder Bartbelängte, politisch weniger korrekte Fortsetzung:
"But there are also Poles in Western Europe"
"Yes, but they are removable"


flüsterrudi, 11.4.2008 11:36 MEZ

trrrrata-tusch!


R.U.GAY, 11.4.2008 11:22 MEZ

Solche Witze schliesst man immer mit einem Trommelwirbel ab...


ein wirklich OIDA sch(m)erz, 11.4.2008 11:17 MEZ

Ja lang ists her:
komischer (teils "Ha-Ha"-komisch, teils "merkwürdig"-komisch) alter Typ an der Tafel: "Wo ist das Magnetfeld der Erde am stärksten?" [Natürlich fühlt sich niemand angesprochen oder würdigt die Frage einer Antwort,wie in VO halt so üblich -daher Selbstantwort:] Ja, bei den Polen!" [Triumphaler Blick in die Runde ob die Begeisterung überspringt, diese erlischt aber ob der leeren, desinteressierten, dumben Blicke der {dummen} Studenten sofort und weicht der üblichen, desillusionierten Alltagsfrustmiene]
Bank: "De hom a ois, die stärksten Magnetföda, insere Autos, insere Fabriken und Arbeitsplätze. Tzzzzzz, de Poin..."

Und schon damals hat niemand mehr gelacht...


R.U.GAY, 11.4.2008 9:08 MEZ

Hier noch der link:

http://www.ams.org/notices/200501/fea-dundes.pdf


Heimatschutzministerium, 10.4.2008 12:45 MEZ

At New York’s Kennedy Airport today, an
individual was arrested trying to board
a flight while in possession of a ruler, a
protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and
a calculator. At a morning press conference,
Attorney General John Ashcroft
said he believes the man is a member of
the notorious al-gebra movement.9 He is
being charged by the FBI with carrying
weapons of math instruction.

“Al-gebra is a fearsome cult,” Ashcroft
said. “They desire average solutions by
means and extremes, and sometimes go
off on tangents in a search of absolute
value. They use secret code names like
‘x’ and ‘y’ and refer to themselves as
‘unknowns’, but we have determined
they belong to a common denominator
of the axis with coordinates in every
country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles
used to say, there are three sides to
every triangle,” Ashcroft declared.

When asked to comment on the arrest,
President Bush said, “If God had wanted
us to have better weapons of math instruction,
He would have given us more
fingers and toes. I am gratified that our
government has given us a sine that it
is intent on protracting us from those
who are willing to disintegrate us with
calculus disregard. Under the circumferences,
we must differentiate their
root, make our point, and draw the line.”
President Bush warned, “These weapons
of math instruction have the potential
to decimal everything in their math on
a scalene never before seen unless we
become exponents of a higher power
and begin to factor in random facts of
vertex.”

Attorney General Ashcroft said, “Read
my ellipse. Their days are numbered as
the hypotenuse tightens around their
necks.”


zuviel Freizeit, 10.4.2008 12:15 MEZ

Q: What’s polite and works for the phone company?
A: A deferential operator.


Der Berator, 10.4.2008 12:07 MEZ

Q: Why did the mathematician name his dog
"Cauchy"?
A: Because he left a residue at every pole.


R.U.GAY, 10.4.2008 12:02 MEZ

Fix, Oida!


mag.e, 10.4.2008 11:59 MEZ

@abelian soup: Ich liech sehr.

@Krocha: Bam!


Hm ..., 10.4.2008 6:16 MEZ

Nicht's für ungut, aber diesen Witz sollte man eigentlich photografieren und zu den übrigen Bärten in ie linke obere Ecke stellen.


Krocha, 9.4.2008 22:39 MEZ

Bam oida!

Pock I ned, oida!


schwarzerkaffee, 9.4.2008 22:18 MEZ

Q: What’s nutritious and commutes?
A: An abelian soup.


mag.e, 9.4.2008 18:52 MEZ

Ahh, die Referenz ist sicher ein Quell des nie enden wollenden Spaßes!

Renteln, P. and Dundes, A. "Foolproof: A Sampling of Mathematical Folk Humor." Notices Amer. Math. Soc. 52, 24-34, 2005.


mag.e, 9.4.2008 18:39 MEZ

Hoho, und darüber steht:
"Renteln and Dundes (2005) give the following (bad) mathematical joke about contour integrals: ..."


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